“Are you settling in?”
This is the most frequently asked question by friends and family. Close behind is the curious, “How is school going?” The short answers, respectively, are “Yes, we are” and “I think it’s going well. I absolutely love it.”
We’ve been here now a week shy of two months. Most of the boxes are unpacked and possessions have found a new place to live. The ones that haven’t remain stored up for a rainy day when they will be the source of much delight and treasure hunting. My walls could stand a few more frames and decorations. Tara has an eye for stuff like that and she’s offered to come over and help me some afternoon.
The new routines are surprisingly still going and are still going surprisingly well. Back in January, I didn’t make a New Year’s resolution, but I did write about how I wanted to embrace the gift of routine in my life. God has given me the chance. What started out as splashing water on my face every day upon waking has steadily blossomed. At this point we have focused mostly on the wake-up through lunch hours. Rome wasn’t built in a day and I don’t suppose stable home routines are built that way either. Change takes time.
This has very much been a team marriage effort.
The home is known as the woman’s sphere, but man is the head of the house. My husband is a man of discipline and a creature of habit by nature. I am not and never have been. I know plenty of couples where the situation is reversed, where the wife is naturally more organized and the husband is more laid back.
The differences aren’t what matters. The difference is how you approach them.
We are slowly learning how to live with one another in a harmonious way, a way that takes the other person’s needs and personality into account, and appreciates the different colors we each bring to the table. Instead of continuous heartache our differences are becoming a source of genuine joy. Together we are making a home.
Even as I type these words I’m fighting back tears. Dad is gone most of today representing camp at the district LWML convention. We have now reached Saturday afternoon and I’m starting to feel the birth pains. This is one of those “something is wrong with the world” times. It seems that no matter where you go, part of marriage will include enduring painful times of separation.
“Lord, grant that I be faithful this day.”
Here in a minute I’m going to ask the bigger kids to please stop playing basketball in the stairway. The lowered noise level should help. We’ve been outside already once and we’ll head that way again. I have fear issues when it comes to them playing outside. I haven’t quite gotten to the point where I can send them all outside to play by themselves and find it peaceful. We are also working on building trust.
God will help me with this as well.