the balance beam

We don’t get out much, and most days, none of us seem to mind.  We have our Wednesday afternoon P.E. at the Y, which we started in the fall.  Thursdays are co-op days, which we added after the first of the year.   For co-op we get together with other home school families and have classes.  It sounds nice, and it is, but I was hesitant to join.

I do have fear of commitments, but I also just want to be careful.  One of the greatest parts about homeschooling is the freedom.  I was thankful we moved when we did.  I haven’t said this to many people, but I even feel like we escaped, as we were just about to enter the ages of endless kid activities, and the end of being home together as a family.

I have mixed feelings about the co-op.  What began with the intention of giving my kids a chance to meet other kids, quickly turned into me volunteering to teach the preschool class this semester, when the original teacher had to quit for family reasons. Teaching preschool this semester, and for the most part enjoying my hour with the kids, got my possibility wheels spinning and almost turned into me willingly signing up to teach Practical Astronomy next semester.  But I didn’t.  I decided, instead, to give it time.

We hear a lot of talk about finding the balance.  Rarely does one fall off the balance beam all at once.  It’s a gradual process, of little by little, adding things to the delicate plate. One day we’re driving down the road toward socialization and experience, and before I know it, the next day I’m flustered and in tears trying to get out the door, hoping my eyes dry before it’s time to teach my class.  It’s then I find myself doubting, wondering whether or not a good thing is the right thing, wanting nothing more than our sweet and quiet school days at home.

At the same time I know it isn’t all about me.  Family life involves a willingness to see beyond ourselves and adjust for one another.  People ask me how long I plan on homeschooling.  I tell them we’re taking things one day at time.  It is my belief, that in order for this to work, it has to be a mutually enjoyable and beneficial experience.

So far it is, and for that, I am thankful.

Dad and I are not morally or philosophically opposed to traditional school–public or private. Homeschooling is just something I’ve wanted to do for a long time, and God has opened up the way for me to do it.  My greatest desire for this time for homeschooling is to walk by faith, keep an open eye and open mind, and make the most of out of every day He gives us.

2 thoughts on “the balance beam

  1. Been there, done that with the whole balance thing 🙂 I’ve got it figured out now, but it took a long time to learn how to say no, not over-commit myself, etc. Finally I just started considering what my kids really wanted to do, what worked for us as a family, and stopped worrying about other people. Maybe that sounds selfish, but we’re all different and have different amounts that we can reasonably give. If I was going to raise good children and keep my marriage healthy I just couldn’t do much else. Accepting that brought me peace.
    So happy to see that homeschooling is going well for you. It’s a wonderful lifestyle- not perfect, nothing is, but it’s great that we have options as parents for how we raise and educate our children. As I type this we’re at a ski mountain for a homeschool day, and it was so nice to be able to do this instead of them rushing off to school. My boys are bonding and learning a new skill together, and it would be totally different if we didn’t homeschool.

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