be still the unknown

Besides the weather, not much has changed since the last time I wrote. Though mild in temperature and snow, it’s been an grey and sunless winter. I’ve done my best to not complain or get depressed about it. There are, obviously, worse things than perpetually cloudy skies. I do enjoy taking pictures of the weather, and over the past several days we’ve gone from this

to this

to this

to this

It’s supposed to be cloudy over the next several days, so I am thankful for the fresh air and sunshine we had during the later part of today. I made a point yesterday to stay away from the news. I’m not against being informed, but I do need a break from the terrible sense of urgency. I feel urgency too, but I need it to be grounded in the peace that comes from knowing God is our strength, and that Christ is our anchor in good times and bad.

My nurse mind is treating this as a serious pandemic. My mother of many mouths to feed mind is seeing this as a threat to the abundant food supplies we’ve been used to. My wife mind is crying with the other wives crying over husbands potentially losing their jobs. My human mind is still in shock and disbelief that something globally awful is actually happening in real life.

My daughter and I baked cookies today. We ate our oatmeal and a simpler lunch. I declared this week to be our spring break and have been using the mornings for ordering supplies, revamping the pantry, and cleaning out the basement/storage/laundry room/tornado shelter. One of the boys wrote “8:30AM-9:00PM–Free Time” on the board. It made me smile, 1) because he thought it, and 2) because he wrote and spelled it out by himself.

It all feels so dreadfully anxious and stressful, not all the time, but it comes in waves. I find myself preparing for things and at the same time asking God just to not let this happen. I don’t mean to pass my anxiety on to you. We aren’t strong enough to carry these burdens, but God truly is, and He bids us to cast our cares on Him. God cares for us, friends. He truly does.

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