after the fact

We had a wonderful first day of school yesterday. The kids completely surprised me by all showing up in navy blue polo shirts and khaki shorts. They’d gotten the idea during one of the times they’d been out shopping with grandma.

I absolutely loved it, and was happy, then, that I’d dressed up for them too. I wore a brand new bright yellow short sleeved sweater shirt, along with a crisp new pair of dark blue jeans. I even put my slightly dressier though still comfortable shoes on.

Later that night, after an afternoon of swimming, the kids were back with Grandma for one more overnight and day together before the high school starts on Wednesday. While my husband and I ate supper, we watched a video my sister had sent me.

It was John Crist’s recent Homeschoolers During the Pandemic, and it was the perfect video, after a close to as perfect as possible day, to come along like a cocklebur and stick itself to my mind, to scratch against any amount of present day doubt and fear.

It’s funny, because at the beginning of the day, before any of the kids were even up, I’d asked God to help me start the school year from a place of confidence and peace, not just in my spiritual life with the Lord, but in my every day life as I’m doing the things.

I am committed to this life, to this homeschooling lifestyle, for however short or long God grants me strength and opportunity. I can adapt and be open to change when need be. I know when I start that I have already failed, that anything I do will never ever be enough.

And yet you absolutely cannot stop me, from that one thing I am determined to do, to give it everything I’ve got and the very best that I can. My strengths as a mom are perseverance, flexibility, and love. Those are universal strengths of any mom that I know.

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